Post Number Seven

On October 18, 2010

Rob talked about Attraction. We started the class with an activity. Rob had asked us these two questions:

§  List features you find attractive (sexually) in a person

§  List 3 features you find attractive in a potential or long term, life or spouse partner

There are many features I find attractive in a man they are also what I would look for in a long term partner. They are handsome, hardworking and funny. Luckily my boyfriend of eight years is all three of those things.

Rob then got into the material by talking about information categorized into three sections: Beauty, Non-Physical Traits and Long Term. Within the Beauty section we learnt that physical attraction is important in a relationship. We also learnt that is varies between cultures. In the Non-Physical Trait section we learnt that there are many factors that can cause people to become attracted to another. They are familiarity, liking someone, respecting someone, sharing values and goals, smiling and gender extremes. The one I found interesting was that women prefer take charge men but men are less attracted to take charge women. I found this to be interesting because I am a very take charge woman and my boyfriend is a very take charge man. I guess some how we found a loop hole into making it work. We didn’t have time this class to cover long term so we continued it in the next class.

On October 20, 2010

During this class we concluded our lesson of attraction and watched a video. We talked about long term attraction. There were three topics discussed. We talked about David Buss and how he believed women were looking for men to provide for them and how men were looking for long term partners. He also believed that people who share a similar attractiveness level are more likely to date. Rob mentioned two terms propinquity and reciprocity. I was familiar with these terms from my EDCM class that I took last year. Propinquity is another term for proximity and when the term is applied to attraction it means that people are attracted to others who are within close proximity to them. For example, my boyfriend and I met in high school. The other term reciprocity means that people seek a mutual exchange in a relationship.

For the last half of the class we watch the 1996 version of Romeo and Juliet. Rob must like this version because he also showed it in FAM315. I personally love this version. The first time I saw this film I was in grade ten in English class. It allowed me to understand the play much better. I felt that the film told the tragic love story in such an interesting and modern way. This film was an introduction to our next topic, love.

October 22, 2010

On this day we started talking about love. Rob talked about some Greek Influences. They were storge (non-sexual love), agape (love of selflessness), philia (brotherly love) and eros(commitment, respect and passion).  Rob also talked about infatuation vs. romantic love. Rob mentioned that infatuation is a phenomenon among the young and is an intense absorption in another person. Romantic love is idealized and is something I feel can be achieved but not one person will ever experience the same romantic love. From a situational perspective everyone experiences a different lived reality. Rob handed out an activity that was to measure the level of love felt by the participant. I took the test and it determined I am in absolute love. It was nice to discover that what I feel was confirmed.   Also during this class we also were introduced to Sternberg’s Triangular model of love. It is a method to determine what kind of love someone is experiencing. We ran out of time this class so it was continued next class.

Thanks for taking the time to read my thoughts and my beliefs!